Love is an aspect of life that is paired with very few animals. Apes, wolves and even termites endure monogamous relationships. But most relevant in our lives are the ones we humans hold. Some may argue that monogamy is a confinement of our potential or a social construct. Do we need life mates? Should we be a polygamous species that carries on sexually with multiple partners?
These questions in my eyes are far too simplistic. The idea of no strings attached sex throughout life with multiple partners sounds great at face value, especially to men, but may not be ideal to all. While some may claim a lifelong single bachelor lifestyle has worked great for them, we see others marrying their 9th grade sweethearts. Why is this?
For some being single for life is more beneficial to their mental, emotional, and even fiscal well being. For others, a certain structure and order is required to be prosperous. Marriage often tends to be that ideal structure. Why though is this a characteristic that changes from one person to the next? Is this nature? Perhaps it’s nurture? Both?
Now, without doing any prior research there is a theory I have been dwelling on recently. The theory is like this: Individuals who come from a stable household have a higher tendency to stray away from marriage. Then there are those from a less stable family, perhaps one that experienced a bad divorce. Marriage would be more common for the people. I liken it to what I once had a friend say to me. He had said “I hate wheat bread. Growing up my mom always had wheat bread, so when I get a chance to get white bread I always do. It’s like a treat.” Now obviously bread is not comparable to marriage but there point is there.
What then is to be said about human nature is that events, actions, and ideas that are irrelevant different or not present in our life are more appealing. What we get accustomed to becomes boring or just unsatisfying.
Do we need monogamy? Would the human race prosper with a fully polygamous society? Of course it’s possible. Is it going to change anytime soon? Definitely not. In the mean time, be more open minded. Don’t treat a guy in your community who is more Bill Maher than he is Tom Hanks. Monogamy works for some and is a disaster for others, but it is certainly not essential to prosperity.